Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
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