so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
We left the knife in your bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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