Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
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