it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
and i looked up. we had an audience...
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
Randomize
