So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
That was an excessively violent trivia night
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Randomize
