question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Randomize
