she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Randomize
