He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Randomize