Texts From Last Night

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  (949): View more from California

  I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden

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  (949) I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden http://tfl.nu/i6ve
  Replies (9) Good night (1700) Bad night (681)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.

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  (404): I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00. http://tfl.nu/7rzt
  Replies (9) Good night (5191) Bad night (1095)
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  (805): View more from California

  Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.

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  (805): Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die. http://tfl.nu/cdvk
  Replies (13) Good night (774) Bad night (2706)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  if i died would you start the facebook group?

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  (330): if i died would you start the facebook group? http://tfl.nu/beoo
  Replies (27) Good night (4422) Bad night (1204)
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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..

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  (902): he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us.. http://tfl.nu/wn2b
  Replies (33) Good night (1602) Bad night (3896)
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  (760): View more from California

  The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.

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  (760): The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too. http://tfl.nu/fqh3
  Replies (3) Good night (3523) Bad night (1128)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.

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  (304): I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk. http://tfl.nu/30xs
  Replies (38) Good night (10729) Bad night (1158)
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  (707): View more from California

  Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.

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  (707): Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage. http://tfl.nu/1an1
  Replies (3) Good night (2352) Bad night (1251)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".

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  (617): my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl". http://tfl.nu/voy6
  Replies (12) Good night (5676) Bad night (1141)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?

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  (513): I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out? http://tfl.nu/sosx
  Replies (6) Good night (1489) Bad night (1186)
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now

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  (920): Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now http://tfl.nu/chmx
  Replies (7) Good night (2072) Bad night (547)
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  (270): View more from Kentucky

  Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex

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  (270): Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex http://tfl.nu/j5jn
  Replies (5) Good night (1757) Bad night (489)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.

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  (850): It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant. http://tfl.nu/v68q
  Replies (6) Good night (569) Bad night (1228)
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  (207): View more from Maine

  C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!

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  (207): C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!! http://tfl.nu/tb1b
  Replies (3) Good night (812) Bad night (384)
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  (949): View more from California

  Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.

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  (949): Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults. http://tfl.nu/b902
  Replies (0) Good night (818) Bad night (365)

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