What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
