Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
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