Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize