Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?