butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Threesome in a minivan. New low
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Randomize
