Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
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