something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
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My wife always gives me head for a while works good
Id I were you, I'd be chasing around for a pretzel. They are always hard. Unless of course its a soft served with cheese. In that case..... Yummmm.
get what up? Is he a magician.
i'm just glad i'm not alone here.
Yeah something is wrong with u! If he can't get it up he better be amazing at something else.....
He can get it up?? im pretty sure It's called cocaine!!!
This is so the situation Im in hahaha
hey this happend to me once givem. a break
I'm Rick James. Bitch.
Yes u do or she would have bitch slapped me for being a pizza humping fuckface
I feel like this text was stolen from my outbox...
dang. i've honestly never been too drunk to fuck.
yes, something is wrong with you. F U G L Y!!!!
fuck him with it soft
1st HAHAHAHAHAAH!!! GO PRETZELS!!!
9:59 must be cranky because hes thirsty from all those pretzels. mmm
Agreed 715. Like making pretzels
7:47 shut the fuck up about the fucking pretzels! I am going to shove those damn pretzels so far down your fucking throat you'll be shitting salt grains for weeks!!!
Why do I find this cute?
HAHA yes umm definitely been there.
Pretzel guy, so hot right now, so hot.
Don't make fun bitch! You can't spell bed without ED!
Probably sexualy exhausted from jackin off to ur pics. Iv had it happen. Kind of embarrasing but my gf laughed it off and gave me a bj
Damn, ur proll right
High-5 me right now.
What are you chasing him for exactly?
Pretzel guy rox
Sadly enough I'm in the same boat.... I am very much so amazed...
I'm squeezing this shit out so hard it's hurting my back muscles. Anyone ever have that?
i for one am super excited that she spelled definitely the right way. rare occurrence right there
Slip him some viagra. ah the miracles of modern science.
Ahhh good old whiskey dick gets ya every time
I wonder if my girlfriend posted this...
he can't get it up with YOU...he probably has no problem getting it up for a young babe with a nice rack, no jelly thighs, a firm ass that will swallow or take it up the ass. If you're a sea hag should you be surprised that he can't get it up? Put some prime pussy out in front of him and watch the johnson stand to attention
Hey we've all been there at some point in time
sure its not whiskey dick?? cause if i'm to drunk to even stay awake its kinda hard to keep it up.
I love you pretzel guy
had this same thing happen to me saturday. thank god i'm not alone in this.
There are such chronic lushes in this world that they cannot achieve or mIntain an erection due to all the damage done from all the toxins in their bodies. Neurologically broken from a
Chronic alcohol poisoning. Doesn't usually hit til at least 5 or more years of chronic abuse. These are loser's losers. She is in deep shir
hahaha this could have been written by me a year ago hahhahaha dumbass girls....
he's probably got money. Needy bitches will offer to fuck anything that has money. Even limp-dicked slobs
By any chance does the guy mentioned in this text live in Venice Beach...??
1- You're a fat slob.
2- Your face looks like roadkill.
Do you happen to have an alibi?
He can't get it up because OP is FUGLY...
I love a man this could be about. and yes, he is goood at other things... ( :
this is just what i needed to see today. whew!
7:34 where can we meet!!!!!!
Pretzel guy. Who are you?
He could be an undercover junkie
i totally feel you... makes you feel like crap too..
11:07 that's beast!!! She blowed u for jackin off! Epic win
Nobody ever texted this... Fake as hell. Copy/paste this until tfln goes back to the old days of real texts and real mods, not just the friends of the staff.