And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
tell me about the fingering
Randomize