drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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