I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
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