Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
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