dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
Randomize