Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
