So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Randomize
