I wanna bring you to show and tell
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
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