People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
