They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Randomize
