the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
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