just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Randomize
