get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize