4 words: hood of his car
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
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Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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