Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
These Dirty People Haven’t Told Their SO About Their Kinky Fetish
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
This is Why People Stop Sex Halfway Through
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often