Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
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