This is not my ceiling
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
