physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
