So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
Randomize
