about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
