Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize