I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize