Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Randomize
