the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Randomize
