My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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