dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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