I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
handjob tips. give me some.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
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