I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
Randomize
