Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
I don't think brook has ever known best
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
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