He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
Randomize
