My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize
