brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
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