hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
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