these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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