one two three fourrrrnication!
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Randomize
